This title has been rattling around in my head for a while now, with no adequate outlet in the shadow of the 2nd Trump administration's push to seemingly throw out without an ironclad claim to stay in USA. To add context for those who may read this in the distant future, a major point of the administration is/was that DEI (the former in my title) is bad. And a stated mission to remove "bad" immigrants illegal or otherwise, but settling for anyone they can get their hands on. I don't think it's possible to adequately convey what that does to a brown immigrant, except to say it sucks out your... joy. And that's when I'm a very overqualified person capable of doing what only a handful of people can, I shudder to think how someone "average" feels. All of this leads to my other definition of DEI in the title.
So why this post, well a few reasons. First and foremost, I'm a father of two now, and I hope some day reading this will give my kids a sense of who their dad is/was and what made him like that. Secondly, I'm a few days away from turning 40 and have been distilling who I want to be, having achieved most of what I truly wanted from my life, and enjoying just living that dream, and at some point in the midlife crisis, you have to just say f*** it and do what the heart feels is right. Thirdly, I was missing a true distillation of what I wanted to say, and as always, a song brought it to me -- Ed Sheeran's currently new single, Sapphire (go listen to it), a collab with Arijit Singh with Punjabi lyrics in the middle, and an unmistakable mix of Indian/Punjabi music ethos into a definitely english song. To sum it up, it's... joy.
As an immigrant, I truly am a citizen of nowhere, not quite fitting in in either country I can call home. And being outside of that mix gives you a perspective that I feel someone who hasn't lived this experience either can't have, or would find it really hard to appreciate -- that cultures are meant to mix, they're not meant to be insular. Growing up, I loved Indian culture, but also felt I disliked parts of it. Being in the USA I see patches for that, but I see other things I dislike. So a fusion, makes sense. Btw, don't get me wrong, I appreciate my luck to be able to do this, and I know how many people cannot have this choice. I hope you'll remember my luck in this case stems from a genetic lottery coupled with parents who essentially toiled their whole life to give me the opportunity, but it would have meant nothing without the insane amount of hard work that made the most of that luck. So, privileged yes, but not only that.
History (and I can't imagine anyone who's read any of the other posts on this blog would be surprised by me giving a history lesson) is full of successful civilizations that blended cultures and were the better for it, as well as disastrous results of trying to not do so. The Romans are a good example of both, yes they were racist to an extent, but they also tried to include every peoples they conquered, and their biggest failure was Britain and Hadrian's wall. The Mongols, and their descendants the Mughals that ran India are a newer example of doing the inclusion part well. The Chinese have a good example of what goes wrong when you insulate cause you're too awesome, and destroy your naval armada to look inward and sell your tech to outsiders, only to have them come back in a few decades and conquer you with your own tech (that was the English and the opium wars btw). Where even the great empires failed is when the inclusion, the blend, the melting pot, started to take over the original peoples that started it.
The United States seems to be at that precipice.
We can argue for ages about "what this country is" and that a eurocentric view is what made this country, and what it is now. There's no convergence on that argument. I agree that's how it started, I'd argue that's probably not why it's the world leader. The USA had luck in the bets it made in WW2, and the country's inherent character to fight a bully presented itself well. But, if you think that's what wins wars, boy do you have some surprises in store for you. The USA won the war on the backs of a few advantages, geographically of course, but an assembly line of tanks, machinery, and most importantly, science. Science, done by the very folks the current administration would very much like to send "somewhere". And not to forget finance, money does run the world. If you think what makes this country is blonde, white people, I think you'd find more in common with some other folks in WW2.
The crux of my point is this, that white folks have enjoyed a long reign at the top of the pyramid in this country, and in most countries for the past few centuries. And in the USA, so have the devout. But maybe that's not all this country has to be, in order to be great. If you want a place to be great, it has to truly be a beacon to all to give it their huddled masses yearning to be free. That ideal is what everything is based on, not the money, not the science, not the weaponry, and not a statue. Cause you can force people for a few years or decades, but the moment you lose that ideal, the next generation of smart people -- dare I say folks like me, and folks very much not like me -- will go somewhere else. And where those people go, so does the greatness, cause it follows great minds, whatever bodies they might happen to reside in. If you're hoping to sit on top of a pyramid of skeletons, then that's what you will have, but such pyramids crumble.
In the meantime, you'll have dumbasses endangering innocents, in the name of righteousness and protecting the country. So, we the people, this is your choice, would you like to build walls around your tiny kingdoms of uniformity, or do you truly want a melting pot. Cause you really can't have both, and you have to understand melting pots have upsides and downsides. The downside? lots of people whose views and thinking are diametrically opposed to yours that will frequently make you uncomfortable. The upside? well joy for one if you include Punjabis, but more seriously, it'll open your eyes to an experience and a world you didn't know existed. Cause life is not meant to be lived in comfort, it's meant to make you question things, and find there's joy and enlightenment in unexpected things.
So why should you believe me, cause after all I'm one of the outsiders myself. Well, here's my shot at tears in the rain. I've seen things you people wouldn't believe, wholly disparate couples who represent this melting pot in a very personal (and successful way). Friends from all over the middle east who truly taught me the meaning of friendship, loyalty, and kindness, and yet more friends born and raised right here who shared a completely different yet so similar picture of the same. Smart people from all over the globe and right here, who taught me the many things that brought me here. And the food, so much amazing food, from dal makhani and gulab jamuns, to tiramisu, escargot, pulled pork and a true southern banana pudding, turkish kebabs, belgian ales, weissbiers, satays, (the many many different) curries, sushi, tacos, burritos and so many things I can't remember right now. Well that didn't hold a candle to Rutger Hauer, but maybe that's best left for the 50th birthday.
To close, I hope you choose joy and find a balance in the melting pot, one that hopefully includes folks like me. Cause though we may not live to see it, history teaches us that a choice in the other direction won't end well for our kids, cause those who don't know history are doomed to repeat it.